Five Times Love Was Enough
by GwennielOfNargothrond
Summary: Prince Aegnor marries the mortal woman Andreth. Their unconventional union is looked upon with doubt. Yet they lived on, just the two of them, content in their being. Five segments from their lives when love was enough to bring them happiness.


**I.**

Their wedding ceremony was small, tiny. There was her mother, father and sister, his brothers. His sister had not been able to attend – she lived in Doriath these days and would not leave. Thus Aegnor and Andreth became husband and wife. It did not feel like a ceremony between families. While Andreth's family was there, Aegnor's was far beyond the sea, unknowing of everything. But perhaps that was as it should be – this was hardly the typical wedding anyway.

She was not an Elda, she was an Edain and proud of the fact. Aegnor admired her for that. Where some Men might have felt small and worthless before the princes of Noldor, she had stood as tall as she could, looked up at him with defiance, ready to put him back into his place if he thought anything less of her. And yet she had looked at him with wise kindness and innocent love, ready to accept him as he was.

In h **is** eyes she was beautiful as a flower, but when he kissed her, she was there, solid and lasting as a rock, stopping him from fleeing to fight, to act rashly, to drown in his role as an exile.

It was hardly a typical wedding, but what had been typical since the death of the Two Trees anyway? Despite all his earlier doubts, Aegnor was ready for this.

 **II.**

The princess of Dorthonion. Andreth had never dreamed of or desired to be a princess. She also was not used to the role. Having somebody wait on her, having somebody to assist her – she had always done everything for herself. Then again, to a certain extent, she found it convenient to have other people to cook for her. More time to focus on her research, studying the old books, learning the lore, writing.

But a princess of Elves. That she was even less used to. Elves around her, being among them, constantly surrounded by them, being _served_ by them. She felt she did not necessary deserve it. The feeling was not helped by the whispers she pretended not to hear.

 _Firstborn should marry other Firstborns, Secondborn should marry Secondborns, it was the rule. Never before had something like this happened. Why was she chosen? What was special about her? How long would she stay anyway? Men grew old so quickly, could Prince Aegnor remain satisfied with someone so old? Her strength would wane, her hair would turn grey, her skin wrinkled. It was perverted of an Elf to choose a partner for such a short time. A plaything in bed, to be returned when of no more use. Why had nobody stopped the union. Truly the house of Finwë had fallen – perhaps it was because Finwë himself had remarried._

Nobody said these things in the vicinity of Aegnor and most avoided implying them even in front of Andreth, but she understood their sentiments. However, she also understood Aegnor. Every evening she fell asleep in his arms, knowing that she was not a temporary comfort. She was his love, he said, kissing her as to make sure she knew just what that meant. Every morning she met together with him. When he told her good morning, picking her up in his arms, his eyes were the sunrise, his smile the first warmth, his kiss the morning dew. And truly her mornings were good.

 **III.**

They never produced an heir. Andreth had never had a great wish of becoming a mother. Her parents might have wished for a child, but she did not believe that was a purpose of hers. And then one day she also realized it was probably too late. She was too old, she told Aegnor.

Aegnor said it did not matter. Many of his brothers and cousins did not have children either, had not even wed. Some lived happily on their own, some less happily but alone nonetheless. Some knowingly abstained from bringing forth a child that would have to live in a world where Morgoth ruled the world. The Watchful Peace still lasted, but Aegnor did not believe it could go on forever. One day it would break and the world would find out who were the stronger ones, the Children of Eru or the Dark Lord and his forces. That had been one of the chief reasons he had once been doubtful of marrying at all. He had finally been convinced that the union would be for the best, but he knew he would never feel the same about children. Not into this cruel world.

So they lived on, just the two of them, content in their being.

 **IV.**

He travelled a lot. His duty as the prince of Dorthonion was to guard the siege, to keep up to date, to meet with his uncle and his cousins. Sometimes he took her with him, especially if it was a longer stay somewhere. While Aegnor met in councils, Andreth would be left to her own devices. She loved to take advantage of the library of Fingolfin whenever they visited the High King's palace. But sometimes she rather stayed home. Less unfamiliar faces, less explaining who she was, what exactly her relationship to Aegnor was supposed to be. A "companion"? Aegnor's cousins were thankfully accepting, but…

When she became older she also tired of travelling sooner. Horseback through the plains, no thank you. Even though they had to part, sometimes for two months at a time, she preferred it. And when Aegnor returned to him, it was as if they had never parted, except she felt so happy, so happy.

From his longer journeys, he would send her letters. They were never the kind of love letters where he would profess his unconditional love in the most poetic ways unimaginable. They would be retellings of his day, covering interesting things he had seen or heard, the occasional thoughts he had pondered and wanted to share. _Why do you think Morgoth has wolves serving him even though he did not create them?_ Or _Do you think stars can shine forever? I don't think they can._ Or _Fingon said everybody has a soul-mate. Not really sure how that would work out._ Or _I wish I could burn all Orcs alive. I don't think I could feel remorse for it._

The letters were a portrayal of who Aegnor was as a person. Philosophical but practical. Kind but with a burning core, with a fire ready to spring to life. She would read each letter with care and store them in a drawer in her study. Sometimes she would reread them, years later. She still did not know whether stars could shine forever.

 **V.**

Unless he fell in battle, he would live forever. She would die in the end no matter how healthy she was. Her mind was sharp, she had not lost her eyesight and her hearing was still excellent. Her hands were wrinkled, her back sometimes troubled her, but as she told Aegnor, she had seen people in much worse conditions. A few cousins had died from sickness while still young, one from childbirth. An uncle had become immobile and would sit by the window day in and day out, unable to be of help. A great-aunt of hers was had lost her memory, confused as for who her daughter-in-law was, confused of why she could not do anything.

Just as Aegnor had promised all those years ago, he had never left her. When they talked, she was still the same girl she had been, when the stars were reflected in her grey hair she was the same woman with whom he had fallen in love. She knew she was still loved. She had never doubted it. Even when her legs grew tired on their walks and she had to sit down, he would patiently sit there by her side, never make her feel broken, never make her feel like a bother. He would pick her a flower and say it still reminded him of her. When summer ended, he would say leaves of the trees only became more beautiful towards autumn. In winter, they would admire the snow-covered plain, glimmering in the light from the low sun.

 **VI.**

"Angrod, do you know…"

"Yes, brother."

"I wish I would have been there with her."

"You were."

"Not enough."

"She will always be with you."

"I wonder. Did you know that she never believed in life beyond death?"

"She told me once…"

"Not in a god either. At least not in an omnipotent one. The very existence of a god was a struggle for her. _It's a fool's hope. For why should there be a Creator who does not take care of their Creations? I do not want such a god._ That's what she used to say."

"Even after all the time she spent with you?"

"Even after everything."

"…"

"Where do people go when they die, if they do not believe in an afterwards? If I die, I go to Mandos, but she will not be there."

"Aegnor…"

"I loved her and I married to be with her, but now she is gone and I cannot follow."

"Even if she did not believe in life beyond death, it does not mean she was not happy while she lived. If her life was all she believed there was, is it not good then that you made that life worthwhile?"

"But now… what will my life be?"


End file.
